I've been shying away from movie reviews this week, not because I don't have one to review. I do, it's Horton Hears A Who!, I give it 3.5 stars, it was a delightful flick. But the reason is... well one, I've got a lot going on this week, don't ask, it's pretty heavy shit. Two, I really wanted to get that Freaks and Geeks piece done, and I lazed a bit over the weekend. Three, it's Tarantino's birthday today.
This is a big deal for me. It's not like I know the guy, or have a man-crush on him or anything. The man-crush is saved for Clooney. But I do idolize the man. He, along with two other filmmakers, are the reason I love movies so much. The other two being Robert Rodriguez and Kevin Smith.
I remember always having an interest in film. Sitting down and watching films with my parents was always fun for me.
But it was... I want to say right around my freshman year in high school that I really started getting into films as a hobby/passion.
One day I went to the library, got all three Godfathers and there went my weekend. But the big red letter day came when my mom got a Blockbuster account. I had a short list of flicks I had always wanted to see, and after she got what she wanted, she let me get a few I wanted. They were out of Empire Records, so I went with Clerks. and Pulp Fiction. I think I also got Mallrats. Thankfully my mom was pretty clueless about those flicks and said "Sure, we can get these."
I went home and popped in Clerks first. Right away, I knew I was watching something that was meaningful or important. At that point, I didn't really have the perspective to grasp why, but I knew it. It was something. And I had just become a part of it. Then I went with Mallrats and Pulp Fiction. In the few days we had them, I must have watched each several times over. At one point my mom walked in during the "My girlfriend sucked 37 dicks!" scene, and was disgusted to say the least. But I just laughed.
After that I got online, to the 1999 edition of IMDb, and read up all I could on the maestros who created such wonderful works of art. And at that point, Quentin Tarantino and Kevin Smith became my heroes.
A year later I caught Desperado early one morning on HBO or something. And that too blew my mind. Because it was a western, but different. That wasn't my dad's western, the John Wayne/Clint Eastwood flicks. This was fuckin' different.
But I really got into these cats, Tarantino, Smith and Robert Rodriguez. At 12-14 years of age, these were flicks that were unlike anything I had ever seen before. And it was just... holy shit.
Then I started reading up on them, anything I came across online about them, I read. Any book I could find, I got. I own a copy of the script for Pulp Fiction. And I read it. Over and over. One day at Hastings I sat down with Rodriguez's Rebel Without a Crew, read about half of it there in the store, then purchased it.
I own copies of scripts by all three. I own movies, soundtracks, memorabilia. It's just... these guys are why I love movies.
And here's why: Above all else, above being directors, writers, producers, editors, actors, musicians, what have you, above all of that... they're fans. They got into it because they love film. They still do it, because they love film. They got into the game on their own terms, and they continue to operate on their own terms.
So as a fan, they're filmmakers I can respect. They love what they do, and that shows in what they make. They make they're films, and if you didn't like it... too bad, it wasn't made for you. It was made for the cats who did like it. Cause they're gonna get it.
I came across this, and I suppose it's only fitting since it's Tarantino's birthday. Happy 45th, Q!
And then there's this video, which for me, was like... if heaven were real... this is what it would be like.
Peace!
-Brodie Mann
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Brodie Mann Films goes... TV?
Brodie Fanns!
Word. To your mothers. As those of you who have been loyally following my cinematic exploits for the past 101 posts, you know that this is a... well... film blog. I talk about film. Movie reviews, lists, essays, what have you. I talk about film.
But occasionally I venture into the realm of Film's awkward younger brother- Television.
I did this once before with Scrubs and I think I'm gonna make this my next big project... discussion on my favourite TV Shows: Past and Present.
One of my all time favourite shows is one that lasted all of 14 episodes on NBC back in the 99-00 season. But in those 14 episodes it proved to be one of the more heartwarming, endearing, original and hilarious shows on television. I'm speaking of course of Freaks and Geeks. From now on, if I write about a film or TV show, I'll link it to the IMDb page for it.
Anyway... Freaks and Geeks. What an amazing show. I had just entered high school at this time. And I had seen a few teen movies, but nothing really ever spoke to me as a new high schooler. It was an awkward time for me. For everyone. And teen movies rarely hit on that. Fast Times at Ridgemont High comes close, the book touches on it better. Breakfast Club, while a good movie, is a tad ridiculous with the stereotypes. I had yet to see/fall in love with the awesomeness that is Dazed and Confused. And 90's teen flicks, basically any after Clueless, were self-indulgent, hipster wannabe flicks. They weren't that good. They tried too hard to be cool and funny.
Freaks and Geeks, however, succeeded where so many had failed. There were the stereotypes of the high school social structure, but just like in real life, they weren't so sharply defined as they were in the late 90's teen flicks. As with any high school, there were the jocks, the geeks/nerds, the smart kids, the popular kids, the theatre kids and so on and so forth. But it wasn't so segregated. They all interacted with each other. And realistically so. It was the anti-Saved by the Bell. Which by all accounts would be reason enough to hate it, because Saved by the Bell is just so gorram awesome.
But like Saved by the Bell, what made it work was casting actual teens in these roles. I think the oldest cast member was Linda Cardellini at 24, the rest were 14-19. It wasn't like Judd Nelson, who was freakin' 30 when he did Breakfast Club. He's still kick ass, though.
So you had teens who had just gone through all this stuff, or still were. They were in the shit. And they knew what was going on. They brought that level of earnestness and reality to the stories they were telling.
And the stories were real stories. They touched on serious subjects, but never got preachy. It was preachy in the way high school guidance counselors are, not like a very special episode of Blossom preachy.
So after only 14 episodes of this much beloved, and now cult classic show, NBC does the smart thing and cancels it. Way to be. You leave ER on well past it's prime... but Freaks and Geeks you cut loose.
So I figured I'd bring you my 10 best Freaks and Geeks moments. For various reasons, these are scenes I just love. They do tend to be Bill or Daniel heavy, but those were the two best characters. I fuckin' hated Neil.
I didn't count these down, cause they're all just classic. So it's just 10 in no particular order. Though the first three really, truly are the best... The rest are just icing on the cake.
Bill Watching Gary Shandling
There are plenty of things that make this clip great. "I'm One" by The Who. The silence of the scene (aside from The Who, of course). It's a brief, yet fascinating look into the world of Bill. He's just a kid who does what he does. It's hard to describe. It's an intensely personal scene, and for a then 14 year old to be exuding that kind of grasp on a character, it's nothing short of brilliant. And it includes Gary Shandling. Who's always delightful.
Daniel Desario is in Track 3
What makes this such a great scene is the fact that it's so poignant, then pathetic, then absolutely hilarious. And he plays it off so well, that you know he's pulled this scam before. Kudos for pulling it on the same person twice in one day. At least trying to anyway.
Homecoming
It was such a relatable moment. Geek finally gets to dance with the girl... and fuckin' Styx totally ruins it. Leave it to Tommy Shaw and Dennis DeYoung to ruin everything. There's this great "DAMN IT" look on Sam's face. But then he rolls with it and has a great time. It's fantastic.
Bill Dances
It doesn't matter if you're cool or not. You're cool with your friends. And that's what matters.
Don't Wake The Dog!!
I've never been this high....
Daniel and Harris
Everyone reaches that point in their life where they wonder not only who they are... but who other people think they are. I love how Harris is who he is, and Daniel is in sheer awe of that.
Vikki and Bill- 7 minutes in heaven?
Coincidentally the 7th video... you have to skip forward to about the 2:30 mark to get the good stuff. To catch you up, the geeks end up at a make-out party, Sam's off with Cindy doin' his thang, while Bill and Neil are playing a rousing game of spin the bottle. Bill ends up with head cheerleader Vikki in the closet. Go Bill! Skip through the bottle spinning and the Sam/Cindy stuff (that storyline doesn't get good till the following episode).
That Punk Rock Music
Thankfully my parents were never that crazy. Or out of it. But luckily I'm that crazy and out of it. I don't know anything about modern music. I'm only 22 and already I'm a TV dad. I don't even have kids. Damn! I talk like that too... "That punk rock I've been hearing so much about." Generally in jest.
Oh yeah... Chicks dig Sam
What's great about this scene, is that with just one tracking shot... Sam goes from king of the world to king of the dorks. He walks in like he owns the place, then the look on his face turns from cockiness to complete terror. Pretty soon, he dies. Not literally, but trust me... he dies.
Stay Cool. Stay Sober. Stay Utterly Lame.
If you say you never had to endure one of these PSA skits in middle or high school... you are a damned liar. Again... DAMNED LIAR! You know how I know you're lying? I used to act in those things. Not because I actually believed them, but I was a theatre kid, what do you expect? Daniel's reaction to the DD is priceless, though. Who hasn't thought that about one of the wicked hot, yet goodly and sober chicks at a party?
So that's it. 10 of the best Freaks and Geeks clips YouTube had to offer. Thanks YouTube.
And thank you America!
-Brodie Mann
Word. To your mothers. As those of you who have been loyally following my cinematic exploits for the past 101 posts, you know that this is a... well... film blog. I talk about film. Movie reviews, lists, essays, what have you. I talk about film.
But occasionally I venture into the realm of Film's awkward younger brother- Television.
I did this once before with Scrubs and I think I'm gonna make this my next big project... discussion on my favourite TV Shows: Past and Present.
One of my all time favourite shows is one that lasted all of 14 episodes on NBC back in the 99-00 season. But in those 14 episodes it proved to be one of the more heartwarming, endearing, original and hilarious shows on television. I'm speaking of course of Freaks and Geeks. From now on, if I write about a film or TV show, I'll link it to the IMDb page for it.
Anyway... Freaks and Geeks. What an amazing show. I had just entered high school at this time. And I had seen a few teen movies, but nothing really ever spoke to me as a new high schooler. It was an awkward time for me. For everyone. And teen movies rarely hit on that. Fast Times at Ridgemont High comes close, the book touches on it better. Breakfast Club, while a good movie, is a tad ridiculous with the stereotypes. I had yet to see/fall in love with the awesomeness that is Dazed and Confused. And 90's teen flicks, basically any after Clueless, were self-indulgent, hipster wannabe flicks. They weren't that good. They tried too hard to be cool and funny.
Freaks and Geeks, however, succeeded where so many had failed. There were the stereotypes of the high school social structure, but just like in real life, they weren't so sharply defined as they were in the late 90's teen flicks. As with any high school, there were the jocks, the geeks/nerds, the smart kids, the popular kids, the theatre kids and so on and so forth. But it wasn't so segregated. They all interacted with each other. And realistically so. It was the anti-Saved by the Bell. Which by all accounts would be reason enough to hate it, because Saved by the Bell is just so gorram awesome.
But like Saved by the Bell, what made it work was casting actual teens in these roles. I think the oldest cast member was Linda Cardellini at 24, the rest were 14-19. It wasn't like Judd Nelson, who was freakin' 30 when he did Breakfast Club. He's still kick ass, though.
So you had teens who had just gone through all this stuff, or still were. They were in the shit. And they knew what was going on. They brought that level of earnestness and reality to the stories they were telling.
And the stories were real stories. They touched on serious subjects, but never got preachy. It was preachy in the way high school guidance counselors are, not like a very special episode of Blossom preachy.
So after only 14 episodes of this much beloved, and now cult classic show, NBC does the smart thing and cancels it. Way to be. You leave ER on well past it's prime... but Freaks and Geeks you cut loose.
So I figured I'd bring you my 10 best Freaks and Geeks moments. For various reasons, these are scenes I just love. They do tend to be Bill or Daniel heavy, but those were the two best characters. I fuckin' hated Neil.
I didn't count these down, cause they're all just classic. So it's just 10 in no particular order. Though the first three really, truly are the best... The rest are just icing on the cake.
Bill Watching Gary Shandling
There are plenty of things that make this clip great. "I'm One" by The Who. The silence of the scene (aside from The Who, of course). It's a brief, yet fascinating look into the world of Bill. He's just a kid who does what he does. It's hard to describe. It's an intensely personal scene, and for a then 14 year old to be exuding that kind of grasp on a character, it's nothing short of brilliant. And it includes Gary Shandling. Who's always delightful.
Daniel Desario is in Track 3
What makes this such a great scene is the fact that it's so poignant, then pathetic, then absolutely hilarious. And he plays it off so well, that you know he's pulled this scam before. Kudos for pulling it on the same person twice in one day. At least trying to anyway.
Homecoming
It was such a relatable moment. Geek finally gets to dance with the girl... and fuckin' Styx totally ruins it. Leave it to Tommy Shaw and Dennis DeYoung to ruin everything. There's this great "DAMN IT" look on Sam's face. But then he rolls with it and has a great time. It's fantastic.
Bill Dances
It doesn't matter if you're cool or not. You're cool with your friends. And that's what matters.
Don't Wake The Dog!!
I've never been this high....
Daniel and Harris
Everyone reaches that point in their life where they wonder not only who they are... but who other people think they are. I love how Harris is who he is, and Daniel is in sheer awe of that.
Vikki and Bill- 7 minutes in heaven?
Coincidentally the 7th video... you have to skip forward to about the 2:30 mark to get the good stuff. To catch you up, the geeks end up at a make-out party, Sam's off with Cindy doin' his thang, while Bill and Neil are playing a rousing game of spin the bottle. Bill ends up with head cheerleader Vikki in the closet. Go Bill! Skip through the bottle spinning and the Sam/Cindy stuff (that storyline doesn't get good till the following episode).
That Punk Rock Music
Thankfully my parents were never that crazy. Or out of it. But luckily I'm that crazy and out of it. I don't know anything about modern music. I'm only 22 and already I'm a TV dad. I don't even have kids. Damn! I talk like that too... "That punk rock I've been hearing so much about." Generally in jest.
Oh yeah... Chicks dig Sam
What's great about this scene, is that with just one tracking shot... Sam goes from king of the world to king of the dorks. He walks in like he owns the place, then the look on his face turns from cockiness to complete terror. Pretty soon, he dies. Not literally, but trust me... he dies.
Stay Cool. Stay Sober. Stay Utterly Lame.
If you say you never had to endure one of these PSA skits in middle or high school... you are a damned liar. Again... DAMNED LIAR! You know how I know you're lying? I used to act in those things. Not because I actually believed them, but I was a theatre kid, what do you expect? Daniel's reaction to the DD is priceless, though. Who hasn't thought that about one of the wicked hot, yet goodly and sober chicks at a party?
So that's it. 10 of the best Freaks and Geeks clips YouTube had to offer. Thanks YouTube.
And thank you America!
-Brodie Mann
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Doomsday
Doomsday
0 stars
No... that's not a typo. I'm really giving this zero stars. No stars. Not even half a damn star. It gets zero. Why? Because it's unoriginal. I know what you're probably thinking... "But Brodie, Hollywood has a long history of unoriginality, why is this so special?" Well, it's so blatantly unoriginal, that based on the trailer alone I picked up on at least 3 movies it ripped off. Actually viewing it gave me a few more.
*SPOILERS HERE IN* Don't read any further if you really want to see it. But I recommend you read further, because you shouldn't want to see it.
In Doomsday, the deadly Reaper virus breaks out in Scotland, causing the British government to wall off the small nation from the rest of the world. In the year 2035, a whole generation later, survivors are spotted on satellite photos, roaming around the streets of Glasgow. An elite military team is sent in to the desolate landscape that once was the mighty Scotland to extract any survivors in hope for a cure, as the Reaper virus is now making it's rounds in downtown London.
And then it gets weird. Because this is when the elite military team comes across the crazy, futuristic cannibal warrior savages that now inhabit and rule the streets of Glasgow and Edinburgh. Taken prisoner, someone gets cooked and eaten, big fight scene... Now they're on the run from the Warrior-king, with King's sister who is leading some sort of resistance against both ruling clans. The first obviously ruled by her brother, the second led by her estranged dad, who has set up a nice little Renaissance Fair in an old castle. Military team not welcome there... big fight scene... The escape, and now there's a big chase scene with a souped up yet 25 year old BMW on the perfectly preserved country roads of Scotland. The cannibals are in this chase in standard post-apocalyptic modes of transportation. Lots of beat up old vehicles adorned with various parts of the skeletal structure. And armed to the core. Which product placement wins in the end?
YAAAWWWNNNNWho cares? Did you count 'em all? We've got Mad Max, Escape From New York, 28 Days Later..., 28 Weeks Later...(while we're at it), Waterworld, Braveheart, Army of Darkness, The Village, James Bond (pick a flick), Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome and a little Warriors thrown in for good measure.
Admittedly, some of those movies have the benefit of time on their side. The Warriors and Mad Max came out the same year as Alien, Manhattan and Apocalypse Now. In 1979, who would have guessed that in nearly 30 years time, we'd still be talking about the former two, and ranking them up there with the latter three? No one probably. And who knows, maybe in 2035 we're talking about Doomsday. Most likely cause it actually happened. Hopefully cause it actually happened, because that's the only way this movie will stay relevant once you're done reading this review.
Well... let's move on to the crap production quality, shall we? Where do I start? Is it the complete lack of direction from writer/director Neil Marshall? Yeah sure. That sucked. And I liked his previous effort, The Descent. But this... it's like he got through the first act and said "Fuck it! You remember Mad Max? Let's do that for a while." Then he got halfway through and said "Fuck it! Mel Gibson's crazy... Let's do Braveheart for a while. With Malcolm McDowell." Which is admittedly cool. The Renaissance Fair town is run by Malcolm McDowell, which as a colleague of mine said, "would be a pretty cool Ren-Fair." But then he got bored with the historical epic angle, and said "Fuck it! Let's have a car chase." Can you see why it's hard to watch?
How about the painfully flat acting of all involved? Including the usually awesome Bob Hoskins. Rhona Mitra, who's done a few episodes of Nip/Tuck and that's about it, tries to keep the "Huge star out of nowhere" mojo alive. But... she's a bad actress. She couldn't even make the "Fake/Bionic Eye" thing cool. Oh yeah, her character has a bionic eye that she can remove and use as a spy camera. How one royally fucks up the bionic eye/spy camera thing, is beyond me.
I award this film no stars. None. Zero. You go home with nothing. You suck. Do not spend money on this film.
One more thing... if this does actually happen in 2035... could we wall of Wales, instead?
- Brodie
0 stars
No... that's not a typo. I'm really giving this zero stars. No stars. Not even half a damn star. It gets zero. Why? Because it's unoriginal. I know what you're probably thinking... "But Brodie, Hollywood has a long history of unoriginality, why is this so special?" Well, it's so blatantly unoriginal, that based on the trailer alone I picked up on at least 3 movies it ripped off. Actually viewing it gave me a few more.
*SPOILERS HERE IN* Don't read any further if you really want to see it. But I recommend you read further, because you shouldn't want to see it.
In Doomsday, the deadly Reaper virus breaks out in Scotland, causing the British government to wall off the small nation from the rest of the world. In the year 2035, a whole generation later, survivors are spotted on satellite photos, roaming around the streets of Glasgow. An elite military team is sent in to the desolate landscape that once was the mighty Scotland to extract any survivors in hope for a cure, as the Reaper virus is now making it's rounds in downtown London.
And then it gets weird. Because this is when the elite military team comes across the crazy, futuristic cannibal warrior savages that now inhabit and rule the streets of Glasgow and Edinburgh. Taken prisoner, someone gets cooked and eaten, big fight scene... Now they're on the run from the Warrior-king, with King's sister who is leading some sort of resistance against both ruling clans. The first obviously ruled by her brother, the second led by her estranged dad, who has set up a nice little Renaissance Fair in an old castle. Military team not welcome there... big fight scene... The escape, and now there's a big chase scene with a souped up yet 25 year old BMW on the perfectly preserved country roads of Scotland. The cannibals are in this chase in standard post-apocalyptic modes of transportation. Lots of beat up old vehicles adorned with various parts of the skeletal structure. And armed to the core. Which product placement wins in the end?
YAAAWWWNNNNWho cares? Did you count 'em all? We've got Mad Max, Escape From New York, 28 Days Later..., 28 Weeks Later...(while we're at it), Waterworld, Braveheart, Army of Darkness, The Village, James Bond (pick a flick), Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome and a little Warriors thrown in for good measure.
Admittedly, some of those movies have the benefit of time on their side. The Warriors and Mad Max came out the same year as Alien, Manhattan and Apocalypse Now. In 1979, who would have guessed that in nearly 30 years time, we'd still be talking about the former two, and ranking them up there with the latter three? No one probably. And who knows, maybe in 2035 we're talking about Doomsday. Most likely cause it actually happened. Hopefully cause it actually happened, because that's the only way this movie will stay relevant once you're done reading this review.
Well... let's move on to the crap production quality, shall we? Where do I start? Is it the complete lack of direction from writer/director Neil Marshall? Yeah sure. That sucked. And I liked his previous effort, The Descent. But this... it's like he got through the first act and said "Fuck it! You remember Mad Max? Let's do that for a while." Then he got halfway through and said "Fuck it! Mel Gibson's crazy... Let's do Braveheart for a while. With Malcolm McDowell." Which is admittedly cool. The Renaissance Fair town is run by Malcolm McDowell, which as a colleague of mine said, "would be a pretty cool Ren-Fair." But then he got bored with the historical epic angle, and said "Fuck it! Let's have a car chase." Can you see why it's hard to watch?
How about the painfully flat acting of all involved? Including the usually awesome Bob Hoskins. Rhona Mitra, who's done a few episodes of Nip/Tuck and that's about it, tries to keep the "Huge star out of nowhere" mojo alive. But... she's a bad actress. She couldn't even make the "Fake/Bionic Eye" thing cool. Oh yeah, her character has a bionic eye that she can remove and use as a spy camera. How one royally fucks up the bionic eye/spy camera thing, is beyond me.
I award this film no stars. None. Zero. You go home with nothing. You suck. Do not spend money on this film.
One more thing... if this does actually happen in 2035... could we wall of Wales, instead?
- Brodie
Friday, March 14, 2008
100th Blog! Here's to 100 More!
Brodie Fanns!
Well... we've reached a milestone. An important milestone. This is my 100th blog posting. I'm of course talking about here on the main blog, the Blogger. If you're reading on the myspace, this is like my 52nd blog entry, and if you're reading on the facebook, I don't know what number this is, because I RSSed my Blogger to my Facebook, and they retroactively posted a bunch. Let's say it's 30-ish. Who the hell knows?
Anyway, I was wondering what would be an awesome 100th post. Then it came to me... my top 100 films of all time. FUCK! I already did that. How about... my top 10 Guiltiest Pleasures? Movies I shouldn't like, and any respectable film critic wouldn't, shouldn't and couldn't. But gorram it, I like them.
So... here you go... the movies I like, nay, love, but probably shouldn't admit to it. But you know what? A lot of these flicks have a nostalgia factor to them. To back when I was a kid, when times were simpler. So that's why I still dig them, even though I've come to realize that The Godfather is the greatest film ever made, not Hook.
10) Can't Hardly Wait
I saw this in theatres the summer before my 8th grade year, mostly due to my massive crush on Jennifer Love Hewitt. But being 12 that year... that flick (amongst many other in the teen genre) shaped my idea of what high school was like. Come to find out that wasn't the fuckin' case, but when you're 12 it's a pretty cool ideal to hold onto. I dug it then, and to this day, it's a cool little nostalgia trip to the late 90's.
9) Roadhouse
Ok, seriously, if I was gonna pick a Swayze flick, it would be Point Break, but I went with Roadhouse for 2 reasons. a) The Riff Trax for this is absolutely hilarious. b) For the wisdom expressed by Swayze in the accompanying clip.
8) Batman Forever
Normally the fact that fuckin' Joel Schumacher directed this would keep it far away from any top ten list... but this movie holds a special place in my heart. Nicole Kidman was freakin' hot, Tommy Lee Jones was crazy, and it's the movie that introduced me to one of my favourite bands- The Flaming Lips. Plus it was kinda cool to see Val Kilmer go from the Lizard King to the Dark Knight.
7) Tremors
This movie can sometimes be a saving grace when it comes to that pesky "Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon" game. My prowess in that game has propelled me to "Favourite Parlour Trick" amongst my friends. Plus, it's a fun, cooky, bizarre monster flick. Who doesn't love those? I'll tell you who. Nazis.
6) Snakes on a Plane
Admittedly much better on a big screen with a theatre full of fans, this is a fantastic cheese fest cult classic. Do you know why this movie is so good? Cause it's snakes. On a plane. And Samuel L. Jackson, the baddest motherfucker ever to walk god's green earth, lays the smack-down on the serpents. It's crazy shit. And I have never been to an opening night, midnight showing of a flick, and people were already reciting lines along with the characters. It was a phenomenon.
5) Mighty Morphing Power Rangers
When I was a kid, there was no show cooler than the Power Rangers. When the movie came out, that was like the shit. I was 9, and I could have died the next day, and I would have led a full life. I still have every single trading card in mint condition. Hells yeah.
4) Demolition Man
Maybe it's that in the future, they view the past (which at the time of the films release, it was the present) to be a quaint, barbaric time. Maybe it's Wesley Snipes' fighting skills. Maybe it's that Sandra Bullock was hot. Maybe it's that in the future, everything was Taco Bell. Who knows why I will watch this movie anytime it comes on TBS? But I do. And I like it.
3) D2: The Mighty Ducks
Too many people view the first one as the superior one. Fuck that. The second one is where it's at. They're taking on the world. Ain't nothin' gonna stop Charlie Conway and his Triple Deke. Or the Bash Brothers. Or Julie the Cat Gaffney. Or Gordon Bombay. They're unstoppable. All hockey games I have ever seen I've always compared to Ducks vs. Iceland. It's Knuckle-Puck time! QUACK! QUACK! QUACK! QUACK!
2) Bio-Dome
In all honesty, trying to pick the best Pauly Shore movie is like trying to pick the shiniest piece of crap in the pile. Either way, it's still a piece of crap. But, this one's so funny. As Phillip J. Fry so eloquently put it... They sure caused trouble in that bubble. One other thing it has going for it... inclusion of a non-Alec, Baldwin brother- Stephen.
1) Waterworld
Kevin Costner drinking his piss. That's where cinema went in the 90's. And thank god they did. I think it caught a bad rap for some stupid reason. But it's a very entertaining Apocalyptic movie. It was like Mad Max meets The Little Mermaid, only Ariel's a dude and drinks her own piss. And really... it's the precursor to Al Gore's An Inconvenient Truth. Thanks for bringing global warming to the cinematic forefront, Kevin Costner. You truly are a visionary ahead of your time. Next time I see you, I'm buying you a nice frosty mug of piss.
-Brodie
Well... we've reached a milestone. An important milestone. This is my 100th blog posting. I'm of course talking about here on the main blog, the Blogger. If you're reading on the myspace, this is like my 52nd blog entry, and if you're reading on the facebook, I don't know what number this is, because I RSSed my Blogger to my Facebook, and they retroactively posted a bunch. Let's say it's 30-ish. Who the hell knows?
Anyway, I was wondering what would be an awesome 100th post. Then it came to me... my top 100 films of all time. FUCK! I already did that. How about... my top 10 Guiltiest Pleasures? Movies I shouldn't like, and any respectable film critic wouldn't, shouldn't and couldn't. But gorram it, I like them.
So... here you go... the movies I like, nay, love, but probably shouldn't admit to it. But you know what? A lot of these flicks have a nostalgia factor to them. To back when I was a kid, when times were simpler. So that's why I still dig them, even though I've come to realize that The Godfather is the greatest film ever made, not Hook.
10) Can't Hardly Wait
I saw this in theatres the summer before my 8th grade year, mostly due to my massive crush on Jennifer Love Hewitt. But being 12 that year... that flick (amongst many other in the teen genre) shaped my idea of what high school was like. Come to find out that wasn't the fuckin' case, but when you're 12 it's a pretty cool ideal to hold onto. I dug it then, and to this day, it's a cool little nostalgia trip to the late 90's.
9) Roadhouse
Ok, seriously, if I was gonna pick a Swayze flick, it would be Point Break, but I went with Roadhouse for 2 reasons. a) The Riff Trax for this is absolutely hilarious. b) For the wisdom expressed by Swayze in the accompanying clip.
8) Batman Forever
Normally the fact that fuckin' Joel Schumacher directed this would keep it far away from any top ten list... but this movie holds a special place in my heart. Nicole Kidman was freakin' hot, Tommy Lee Jones was crazy, and it's the movie that introduced me to one of my favourite bands- The Flaming Lips. Plus it was kinda cool to see Val Kilmer go from the Lizard King to the Dark Knight.
7) Tremors
This movie can sometimes be a saving grace when it comes to that pesky "Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon" game. My prowess in that game has propelled me to "Favourite Parlour Trick" amongst my friends. Plus, it's a fun, cooky, bizarre monster flick. Who doesn't love those? I'll tell you who. Nazis.
6) Snakes on a Plane
Admittedly much better on a big screen with a theatre full of fans, this is a fantastic cheese fest cult classic. Do you know why this movie is so good? Cause it's snakes. On a plane. And Samuel L. Jackson, the baddest motherfucker ever to walk god's green earth, lays the smack-down on the serpents. It's crazy shit. And I have never been to an opening night, midnight showing of a flick, and people were already reciting lines along with the characters. It was a phenomenon.
5) Mighty Morphing Power Rangers
When I was a kid, there was no show cooler than the Power Rangers. When the movie came out, that was like the shit. I was 9, and I could have died the next day, and I would have led a full life. I still have every single trading card in mint condition. Hells yeah.
4) Demolition Man
Maybe it's that in the future, they view the past (which at the time of the films release, it was the present) to be a quaint, barbaric time. Maybe it's Wesley Snipes' fighting skills. Maybe it's that Sandra Bullock was hot. Maybe it's that in the future, everything was Taco Bell. Who knows why I will watch this movie anytime it comes on TBS? But I do. And I like it.
3) D2: The Mighty Ducks
Too many people view the first one as the superior one. Fuck that. The second one is where it's at. They're taking on the world. Ain't nothin' gonna stop Charlie Conway and his Triple Deke. Or the Bash Brothers. Or Julie the Cat Gaffney. Or Gordon Bombay. They're unstoppable. All hockey games I have ever seen I've always compared to Ducks vs. Iceland. It's Knuckle-Puck time! QUACK! QUACK! QUACK! QUACK!
2) Bio-Dome
In all honesty, trying to pick the best Pauly Shore movie is like trying to pick the shiniest piece of crap in the pile. Either way, it's still a piece of crap. But, this one's so funny. As Phillip J. Fry so eloquently put it... They sure caused trouble in that bubble. One other thing it has going for it... inclusion of a non-Alec, Baldwin brother- Stephen.
1) Waterworld
Kevin Costner drinking his piss. That's where cinema went in the 90's. And thank god they did. I think it caught a bad rap for some stupid reason. But it's a very entertaining Apocalyptic movie. It was like Mad Max meets The Little Mermaid, only Ariel's a dude and drinks her own piss. And really... it's the precursor to Al Gore's An Inconvenient Truth. Thanks for bringing global warming to the cinematic forefront, Kevin Costner. You truly are a visionary ahead of your time. Next time I see you, I'm buying you a nice frosty mug of piss.
-Brodie
Thursday, March 13, 2008
10,000 B.C.
Brodie Fanns!
New review for you. I'm goin' pre-historic on your asses.
10,000 B.C.
1 Star
So... Roland, if I may call you that. What the hell happened? You had us with Stargate, Independence Day and The Day After Tomorrow. And now this? I don't even know what to classify this as. It's barely a step above something the Discovery Channel would put together, only with a Sci-Fi Channel twist.
D'Leh (Steven Strait) is a hunter/warrior from what I only assume is a Sub-Saharan mountain tribe. After his tribal lands are attacked by Egyptian warlords, he embarks on a quest to save his one true love, who also happens to be his people's saviour. I think. Along the way, he meets up with other tribes who have been attacked by the Egyptians, and they all stage a revolt to free the slaves being used to build the pyramids.
Where to begin with what is wrong with this film? Is it the laughably bad dialog? The maybe dead languages they use? Could it be the very obvious visual effects they use? Or how about the oddly perfect bodies they have? I'm not talking being fit. I'm talking nice skin, well maintained hair, perfect manicure, perfect make-up. On tribes-people.
There was nothing about this production that worked. It's almost as if they wanted to fall in line with Mel Gibson's historical epics, but decided they didn't want to spend a lot of money. And good lord did it show.
And you could tell the actors were of the mindset "This movie sucks, but at least I have one more thing to put on my resume. And a paycheck." I can't comment on their performances... because to call what they all did acting is an insult to acting.
I'm being generous with my one star rating, as I usually don't believe in the "Award for just showing up" philosophy. But come on... they tried.
But really, I can't recommend this to anyone. Avoid it.
- Brodie
New review for you. I'm goin' pre-historic on your asses.
10,000 B.C.
1 Star
So... Roland, if I may call you that. What the hell happened? You had us with Stargate, Independence Day and The Day After Tomorrow. And now this? I don't even know what to classify this as. It's barely a step above something the Discovery Channel would put together, only with a Sci-Fi Channel twist.
D'Leh (Steven Strait) is a hunter/warrior from what I only assume is a Sub-Saharan mountain tribe. After his tribal lands are attacked by Egyptian warlords, he embarks on a quest to save his one true love, who also happens to be his people's saviour. I think. Along the way, he meets up with other tribes who have been attacked by the Egyptians, and they all stage a revolt to free the slaves being used to build the pyramids.
Where to begin with what is wrong with this film? Is it the laughably bad dialog? The maybe dead languages they use? Could it be the very obvious visual effects they use? Or how about the oddly perfect bodies they have? I'm not talking being fit. I'm talking nice skin, well maintained hair, perfect manicure, perfect make-up. On tribes-people.
There was nothing about this production that worked. It's almost as if they wanted to fall in line with Mel Gibson's historical epics, but decided they didn't want to spend a lot of money. And good lord did it show.
And you could tell the actors were of the mindset "This movie sucks, but at least I have one more thing to put on my resume. And a paycheck." I can't comment on their performances... because to call what they all did acting is an insult to acting.
I'm being generous with my one star rating, as I usually don't believe in the "Award for just showing up" philosophy. But come on... they tried.
But really, I can't recommend this to anyone. Avoid it.
- Brodie
Friday, March 07, 2008
Return of the List!
Brodie Fanns!
If you remember, a while back I did an epic mini-series of blog postings where I counted down my top 100 favourite films. As a follow-up, I started to post the top 10's of my various family members. I then took a break from that, due to big happenings in the world of cinema, including the end of the Writer's Strike, and then my fatigue inducing Oscars 08 Live blog-a-thon.
But now I'm back, from outer space... kidding, I'm back with that follow-up series, and this week, I'd like to thank my sister for providing me with her top 10 list. Also... her son, my nephew, is due in like... 2 months. I couldn't be happier for her and my brother-in-law.
Here's Heather's List:
1.Gone With the Wind
2.Love Actually
3.Never Been Kissed
4.Hairspray (the new one)
5.How the Grinch Stole Christmas (Jim Carrey)
6.Beauty and the Beast (Disney)
*ALREADY POSTED VIDEO ON THIS ONE*
7.The Goonies
8.Forrest Gump
9.Grease
10.The Passion of the Christ (not so much favorite, just a really powerful movie...hard to watch...saw it twice in theathers and bought it but I haven't watched it since.)
Well, that's my sister's list. Next week... who the heck knows. Could it be Katherine? One of my parents? Is Jesus stopping by? The world may never know. At least not till Friday. Have a good one!
-Brodie Mann
If you remember, a while back I did an epic mini-series of blog postings where I counted down my top 100 favourite films. As a follow-up, I started to post the top 10's of my various family members. I then took a break from that, due to big happenings in the world of cinema, including the end of the Writer's Strike, and then my fatigue inducing Oscars 08 Live blog-a-thon.
But now I'm back, from outer space... kidding, I'm back with that follow-up series, and this week, I'd like to thank my sister for providing me with her top 10 list. Also... her son, my nephew, is due in like... 2 months. I couldn't be happier for her and my brother-in-law.
Here's Heather's List:
1.Gone With the Wind
2.Love Actually
3.Never Been Kissed
4.Hairspray (the new one)
5.How the Grinch Stole Christmas (Jim Carrey)
6.Beauty and the Beast (Disney)
*ALREADY POSTED VIDEO ON THIS ONE*
7.The Goonies
8.Forrest Gump
9.Grease
10.The Passion of the Christ (not so much favorite, just a really powerful movie...hard to watch...saw it twice in theathers and bought it but I haven't watched it since.)
Well, that's my sister's list. Next week... who the heck knows. Could it be Katherine? One of my parents? Is Jesus stopping by? The world may never know. At least not till Friday. Have a good one!
-Brodie Mann
Monday, March 03, 2008
Vantage Point
Brodie Fanns!
It's been a week since I last saw you guys. Seriously, a week. Since the Oscars, really. And there is a perfectly logical explanation for that. That whole live blog thing I was doing, I was doing on 3 different blogs. And that took a lot out of me. It was tiring. Plus I had a few days off work, so I just sat around getting drunk all week.
Anywho!
Here's a new review-
- Brodie Mann
It's been a week since I last saw you guys. Seriously, a week. Since the Oscars, really. And there is a perfectly logical explanation for that. That whole live blog thing I was doing, I was doing on 3 different blogs. And that took a lot out of me. It was tiring. Plus I had a few days off work, so I just sat around getting drunk all week.
Anywho!
Here's a new review-
Vantage Point
3 Stars
It’s a good movie that keeps you guessing, has interesting plot twists and is well acted all around. It’s a bad movie where the plot would have been a really good season of 24.
Vantage Point is told Rashomon style (log onto IMDb and look it up), and we get several interesting perspectives on a terror plot to assassinate the president of the United States in Spain. And thanks to that nice little summary, my blog is now “one of interest” to several government agencies. We get the perspective of Secret Service agents Thomas Barnes and Kent Taylor (Dennis Quaid and Matthew Fox), tourist Howard Lewis (Forest Whitaker), the terrorists, their pawns, a news crew (Sigourney Weaver and Zoe Saldana and even the president himself (William Hurt). It all culminates in a pulse pounding series of chase sequences, ending in glorious American cinema fashion: dead bad guys, heroically and miraculously alive good guys.
For what comes off as Die Hard meets 24 with a little Bourne Identity thrown in mix, it really isn’t as bad as it could have been. The mixed narrative gets a little annoying because some versions overlap with other versions, so you’re getting the same story over and over, rather than multiple yet separate stories.
I’ve long thought of Dennis Quaid as the poor man’s Harrison Ford. Which I still stand behind. But you have to remember, even if you’re getting discount store Harrison Ford, Dennis Quaid is the Target version- still really cool. At least he’s not Tom Berenger, the K-Mart Harrison Ford. It was good to see Matthew Fox take on this kind of role, as you can see him start to shed the “Jack Shephard” image he’s been relishing in for the past three and a half years. I’m interested to see what he does as Racer X in Speed Racer come May. Edgar Ramirez continues his streak of roles requiring him to be the mysterious Latino with a steely glare. But if I were making a movie that had a mysterious Latino with a steely glare in it, I would pick Ramirez, as he’s not a bad actor, just needs to step out of the typecasting.
As I said before, my interest in the plot starts to fall apart during the first act when they’re constantly re-showing the assassination. Luckily once that’s over about 40 minutes in, we can settle in on some good, old-fashioned, pulse-pounding action fun. And it doesn’t skimp on that. It is an unfortunate page right out of Jason Bourne’s playbook though, and at times, I thought I had been magically transported to the summer of ’02 and was watching Matt Damon speed around a European city.
But while it does draw a lot of comparison to previous works, it still is an enjoyable film. I predict we’ll see some heavy rotation on the USA network in a few years, as this flick seems right up their alley.
- Brodie Mann
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